you may say Im a dreamer...

Confession: I didn't force myself to get up early and exercise. (who saw that one coming?)

There's a saying that I heard recently that says: "speak less of your plans, you'll get more done." (and not feel like such a failure when you don't follow through with those plans... ha!)

Anyway, I always have a really difficult time finding the energy to set out for a run right away after waking up.... and I also usually wake up really hungry or become really hungry about 30minutes after getting up. ...Again, probably one of those things you have to just DO and make it a routine.

ugh, damn you first steps.

But I think I also had a hard time getting up this morning because I was dreaming pretty intensely last night.

I dream a lot.

I have a pretty active imagination which has led to very vivid dreams, imaginary friends, invented personalities (crazy much?)

My parents were convinced I would be an actress or performer of some kind.. (weird how that kind of just disappeared..

(the performing, not the overactive imagination))

...but I don't always remember my dreams -- usually I just remember bits, or that they were strange.

(they're always strange....)

Last night I dreamt, and I pretty much remember the whole thing

and, yes, it was a strange one!

OK, so you know how dreams are usually all jumbled up and random? Here it goes:

I was in a bathroom that was like a teacher's or employee lounge with a big circular table... right across from stalls.

There was something going on with a girl trying to hide or something and this (tough, but short and kind of awkward) guy comes in and all the sudden she disappears. (into thin air?) and he's on a cell phone (carrying a map ?????) and walks out.

meanwhile I was at the table the whole time - holding my phone in my hand for some reason but not using it - and basically falling asleep with my head in my hands, even doing the head bob thing, but still stealing glances at enforcer man, thinking he is going to come over after me.... but he never does.

So then, somehow I wake up (?) -in my dream- and notice that there is someone in the middle stall that has been in there a long time and I see through the cracks that she is looking out and is really scared.

I go to the next stall over and climb on the toilet to try to look over at her (Ive said hello or something to her with no response) and for some reason the toilet is really far from the wall so Im trying to climb and maneuver this, but I grab the stall walls and they are really rickety and wobbly so, while I got to a high-enough point, I was never actually able to see the woman in the other stall.

So, of course, I make it my business to find out what's going on and she finally comes out (I think??) and she's crying and scared and what-not but I never figure out what's happening, and then the last thing I remember is a herd of people rush in and up the stairs (yes, there are stairs in the bathroom) and a couple of them are officers, with light-ish blue uniforms and drapey um, coils?, like a European uniform --- (ok, actually, now that Im thinking about it they kind of look like something from Cinderella... awkward.) --- rushing towards us, on a mission and looking mad.

But I woke up as soon as they get to us.

...weird.

Where does this stuff come from!? (watching too many movies and crime shows, probably)

but, it also makes me think that it is some kind of message (that sounds so hokey!) - maybe I need to help people in danger or scared?

I have always been the helper and the one that swoops in when things get bad and crazy to either smooth things out or take others to "safety" (away from whatever conflict is going on)

I remember one year - I was probably around 12 or 14 or so? - our whole family (mom's side) had a "reunion" at our old beach house.

For whatever reason there is a lot of bad blood and tension and resentment that has been held and repressed by all the kids (mom and her siblings) for YEARS!

So when everyone was together - you guessed it - all hell broke loose.

And even though there were two other adults there, somehow I was the one that swooped in with my mama hen wings around everyone and brought the kids (grandkids) and the other helpless adults downstairs and kept them calm while the fighting ensued upstairs.

and that is just how it always is.

so, there's that.

I don't know what that means but it's something to think about....