today has been harder than I expected.
I have no idea why I thought I would just miraculously not feel sad anymore but.... I do that. I never think things are going to be bad (traffic? nooo... it'll be fine.)
Or, rather, I knew I would still be sad, just not this sad.
We have started cleaning up and discarding the things she used. I came straight home and got rid of her litter box and moved her kitty bed, and mom got rid of her food and water dishes and now it just looks empty. I said yesterday I would help move the rug she slept (and vomited) on and when I came home today it was gone.
I dont know which is better (worse?) to have the things around that only remind me of her, or to clean it up almost so there is no trace of her other than the pictures and memories... To think of her every moment, or to start forgetting her already....
I don;t want to be a sad-sack, but Im not ready to forget her...
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